Signs of autism in teens

Maybe you’ve noticed that your teen is struggling with certain aspects of school life, social situations or expressing their emotions. Maybe they’ve confided in you that they feel different from their friends and classmates. Or you might have observed that they often seem overwhelmed, struggle with emotional regulation or have particular sensory sensitivities. 

With an estimated 1 in 70 Australians falling somewhere on the autism spectrum, it’s possible that your teen might be autistic. 

Understanding autism in teens

While autism spectrum disorder (ASD) is often diagnosed in childhood, an increasing number of autistic people aren't being diagnosed until their teenage years or even later. 

There are various reasons why signs of autism might become more noticeable during adolescence or why a diagnosis might not have been considered earlier. 

Some teens develop strategies as younger children to mask or camouflage signs of autism, but these can become more visible as they mature. Other parts of their identity – like gender, sexuality or cultural background – can also influence how autism presents and why it wasn’t picked up earlier.

Signs and symptoms of autism in young people

There are a range of signs that might indicate a young person is autistic.

Communication and language You might have noticed your teen:

• has deep conversations about their special interests but finds other topics challenging to engage with

• uses more formal language or speaks with unique patterns in tone and volume

• takes things literally, rather than understanding figures of speech

• finds it hard to follow multi-step instructions

• experiences discomfort with eye contact or expresses emotions in unique ways

• finds the typical flow of conversations, like turn-taking, challenging.

Social interactions You may notice that your teen:

• feels more comfortable with adults or younger children than with their peers

• prefers structured activities or spending time alone

• finds it challenging to make or keep friendships

• finds it hard to read body language and social cues – they look for clear social rules and expectations.

Routines and structure You might have observed that your teen:

• thrives on consistent daily routines

• finds unexpected changes to routines difficult to manage

• creates specific ways to organise spaces and belongings.

Sensory processing Your teen may:

• experience heightened or reduced sensitivity to sounds, lights, textures or tastes

• have strong preferences for certain clothes or foods based on their texture

• actively seek specific sensory experiences that feel comforting

• process touch, temperature or pain differently from others

• use stimming behaviours to self-soothe, such as always having something in their hands, repeating movements or sounds, twisting their hair, jiggling their legs or swaying when standing still.

Learn more about the signs of autism in pre-teens and teens.

Why some teens receive later diagnoses

Masking or camouflaging Many young people, especially girls, gender-diverse people and those from different cultural backgrounds, develop strategies in childhood to ‘mask’ their autistic traits. They might carefully observe and copy their peers' behaviour, so that their own mannerisms and behaviours are less visible to others. Masking autism can be exhausting and may become harder to maintain as social demands increase in their teenage years, leading to potential autistic burnout.

Different presentations Each autistic teenager is different. Some autistic teens might have strong language skills or excel academically, leading to their other challenges being overlooked. The stereotype of what autism ‘looks like’ has historically been quite narrow, and is often misinterpreted as anxiety or depression, leading to incomplete or inappropriate treatment options.

Changing social demands The transition to high school or uni brings new social complexities and expectations. What worked in a previous educational setting might not work in a new one as a child’s learning environment changes. This added pressure can make certain challenges more apparent.

Growing self-awareness Teens often develop a stronger sense of self-awareness as they mature and might start noticing and expressing differences they feel from their peers. This self-reflection can lead to important conversations about neurodivergence.

How can an autism diagnosis help my teen?

A formal autism diagnosis can give your teen a better understanding of themselves and their lived experiences. It can also help to connect them with other autistic people who share similar experiences, which can be validating.

A diagnosis can also help your teen to access NDIS funding, support and legal protections at school, such as NESA special provisions, or additional support and professional services in the workplace. Learn more about the process of diagnosing autism in pre-teens and teens.

How can I support my teen if they’re showing signs of being autistic?

Whether or not your teen receives an autism diagnosis, there are many ways you can support their needs. It’s also helpful to remember that your role as a parent or carer is to:

• support your teen in understanding and accepting themselves

• advocate for their needs while teaching them self-advocacy

• celebrate their strengths and unique perspectives

• help them to develop strategies that work for them

• connect them with supportive communities and resources.

If you think your teen might be autistic, here are some supportive ways to approach the topic with them.

Create a safe space  Choose a quiet, comfortable space during a time when neither of you will be interrupted.

Practice active listening  Active listening involves asking open questions like: ‘I've noticed you seem to find some situations challenging. Would you like to talk about that?’ or ‘What parts of school do you find most challenging or enjoyable?’

Prepare your teen for social experiences Rehearsing different scenarios with your teen can help them if they find navigating certain types of social situations challenging. This could be situations at school, with family or friends, or when participating in activities.

Share information with them If your teen shows a keen interest in something, you could share relevant articles or videos from autistic creators on that topic.

Follow their lead Some teens might want to explore the possibility that they are autistic right away, while others might need time to process it. Respect their pace.

It might not always be easy to communicate with each other, so we’ve put together a guide filled with practical tips to help you navigate conversations with your teen.

Seek professional support

If your teen is struggling in their day-to-day life, there are a range of professional support options available regardless of a diagnosis. These include therapies like cognitive behavioural therapy, modelling, peer training, social skills groups and self-management strategies. Learn more about choosing the right type of health-care provider.

While your teen is waiting to see a professional, they can also find support through spaces like ReachOut’s Online Community where they can chat with other young people who are experiencing similar things, or they can book a chat with an experienced peer worker.

Explore school support systems

The Disability Standards for Education require both public and private schools to have some level of support for students with a confirmed disability, which includes those with an autism diagnosis. These supports include:

• Individual Education Plans which can be developed with or without a formal diagnosis

• reasonable adjustments, such as:

  • extra time for assignments and exams

  • quiet spaces for breaks

  • modified assessment methods

  • support with organisation and planning

• access to a school counsellor for emotional and social support

• providing autism-specific training for their staff.

Understanding how to support neurodivergent students and exploring the types of support your teen’s school can offer can be especially helpful when navigating stressful periods like exams and assessments.

Learn more about how to support your autistic teen at school.

Support yourself and your family

If you have more than one child, it can be easy to overfocus on the one with more pressing mental health and wellbeing issues. It’s important to support your autistic teen’s siblings and to help them navigate their own experiences.

You might also notice that you, your partner/s or co-parent/s relate to some of the signs of autism in teens, or maybe you already have a diagnosis yourself. Being an autistic parent with an autistic child has its own rewards and challenges. It can be helpful to seek professional and social support for yourself or your partner/s.

Remember that this experience is unique for every family. Some days might be challenging, no matter how prepared you are. Focus on understanding, accepting and embracing your teen's strengths and unique ways of experiencing the world.